Monday 26 July 2010

Tiger, this is your triumph

Tiger, I warned you I was flying two foot off the ground. And that I would tell the whole world.

Yes, Tiger, I'm proud of you.

There is a bit of a triplet brain that is very difficult to describe. Parents of triplets will know it. It is, how do you know who you are, when there are others who look just like you, staring back?

You might tell your difference by making different areas of personality to inhabit. You carve up identities, like you might carve up the last slice of pie.

She likes dance, so I can't like dance. I must like painting. She says she likes painting. Then I must like sewing. I don't like sewing. I'll say I do. Then I can be the sister who likes sewing.

I have noticed these forgeries, and I have wrung my hands over them, fretting about the wrongs you do to your who-you-are. I have worked to prise this bond apart. I have said, again and again, 'But it's OK to like the same things! At the same time!' (Yes, I know with the ice skating and horse riding, lessons together would break us, but I have an answer for that. Simply decide the order, one, two, three, and we pay the lessons, one, two, three.)

Tiger, you blasted this triplet grip apart. You declared that you wanted that windsurfing course, come hell or high water. Or both.

Dear daughter, you made it. You only feared that Shark would stare at you, mirror face accusing, reminding you that she is the water child. She with the monopoly on sails.

Shark does not do that. I said she would not. And this time I didn't even need to buy her complicity. (Well, only the cookery book, which doesn't count.) And what happens? Shark is delighted that she can share her watery world, with you, her twin/triplet sister.

Tiger, there is another reason why I'm proud of you.

This morning, you were suddenly caught by the terror of what you were about to do. This gigantic leap across your personality. Your sudden overboard jump into unknown water. Into a real lake. With fish. Who poo.

The horror froze you. For an hour. I thought you would refuse to go. Finally, I said that if you did not get into the car now then I must give your course to one of your triplet sisters. Because I paid already!

Your Oppositional Defiant Disorder kicked in, came running up and punched me in the face. Quick as a snap you bared your teeth, clawed the air, and leaped off that chair as if propelled by rocket fuel. Within thirty seconds you were sat in the car. The look on your face was unforgettable. More determined than I have ever seen you in my life.

And this, Tiger, makes me so very proud of you, daughter of mine.




6 comments:

R. Molder said...

Oppositional Defiant Disorder - awesome!!!!

sharon said...

Yay Tiger, ODD and all!

stefndawniy said...

is it ok to post about your article 'Same words,different worlds' on the far out crowd blog ring ?
thanks
dawn :)

Grit said...

hi dawn, yes, i'm happy for it to be referenced on the far out blog ring if it helps.

stefndawniy said...

Thank you Grit

and Tiger no wonder your mum is so proud of you :-)

Anonymous said...

Love this. How well you know them to really understand them. But do we ever grow out of a desire for pointless differentiation?