Acting like grown ups

Tra la la! Ellie and Mister W are coming to dinner! Tra la la! Tum te hum! Do de dum!

Grit is all happy now because next week Ellie and Mister W are coming to dinner and they are not aged six, or even seven! No! They are proper grown up humans! They do not throw themselves to the floor and howl in Tesco! They do not hang on the door frames refusing to move! They do not swing on my front room curtain and then, as the curtain comes crashing down about their heads, say 'She did it!' No, no, no no no. None of these.

And what's more, we won't have to send Ellie and Mister W to their rooms for kicking the chairs, slamming the doors or waving scissors dangerously. And we won't have to tell Ellie and Mister W off for sitting on their chairs in a silly way, or for making irritating noises, or for throwing all the cushions off the sofa, and smuggling the cuddly leopard under the kitchen table at eating time when everyone knows he is Not Allowed Now because he causes fights. No! Ellie and Mister W are lovely grown up people who really are very grown up and adult and quite possibly may be among the few adult people I will speak to for more than five minutes this year without being interrupted.

Because, and this is the best of it all, Ellie and Mister W are leaving their offspring at home! With a babysitter! And we are bundling Squirrel, Tiger and Shark upstairs and nailing planks across their bedroom doors so that they cannot get out!

Well, OK, that last bit's just wishful thinking right now, but it's hoped that eight hours of listening pleasure with the audio book series of Watership Down will have the same effect, while Ellie and Mister W and Grit and Dig are all downstairs doing what grown ups do best. In Grit's case this might be drinking heavily and falling asleep in front of the fire. But let's hope it's sharing dinner, being civilised, and talking.

Talking, probably, about the children. But heigh ho, this is a start.