Sunday, 24 May 2009

Busy doing nothing

I have set the entire family a goal of achieving nothing. We are very successful at this. I may make it an educational aim and gear all my provision towards it.

Here is what the family achieved today.

Dig. Sat at computer making stuff happen so he can go to Spain, show it to people, and they pay him. Don't ask questions. We have a mortgage. Unlike some politicians, we can't pass that onto the UK citizens.*

Grit. Set green beans on fire. Round here the fire alarm is called the dinner bell.

Squirrel. Made a film. This is what she says about it, word for word.

I'm making a film with pink embroidery thread. This is what the audience, if they were watching, that's what they'd watch. Pink embroidery thread whizzing past their eyes. It's amazing because they [toys, ed.] don't have any film. It's with batteries and electric circuits so it's got a sound oooo oooo oooo oooo oooo oooo. It's not that exciting. I haven't put any pictures on yet.

Shark. Read a lot of book. Given sufficient provocation, shouts Youareanidiot. PoopyBrain. DamnOhmyGodBloodyPissOff.

Tiger. Made apple pie. Chatted about rubbish in cute and beguiling manner. Excellent result for nothing. Well done, Tiger.

*Given half a chance, we would.


The Gossamer Woman said...

It sounds like you all had a very productive day. It was very imaginative anyway. Everybody's deeds were unique in their own way. Very versatile.

sharon said...

But where are the pictures of all this wanton nothingness? At least the burnt green beans could have made it into a photo!

Grit said...

i do have a photo of the pie. the computer would not let me load it, otherwise you could have seen that. i immediately poured vinegar into the pan. that works to remove burn stuff. i don't know why.

Katherine said...

Squirrel sounds VERY MUCH like my art tutor. Conceptual art. Brilliant. She'll go far. I'm hopeless at that modern stuff. All I can do is draw. I'll never make a living. I'm thinking of appropriating her idea.

I disconnected the smoke alarms in my kitchen. The neighbour complained the accompanying dog howling went right through her.

Grit said...

hi katherine! squirrel has her own way of learning and i admit it can sometimes be so conceptual, it passes me by!