Thursday, 21 May 2009

But I liked the email sign off, REVOLUTION NOW. Best wishes, Doreen.

The Titanic moment of my sinking heart probably happens around midday. Coming home, I attempt to 'catch up'. After two hours of cruising about those home education emails, discussion lists and blogs I need to lie down. If only I could blame jet lag.

I have read two hours of We are all doomed. You and I are servants of the state, indoctrinated, oppressed, heading down the toilet and pulling the flush ourselves. Seriously, it's enough to make me want to reach for that rope.

But don't feel safe.

Don't imagine this prediction of doom and gloom is just a home ed issue. Oh no, we are way beyond that. No-one escapes. And certainly not if you send your kids to school. Or if your newborn is two months old. Those marching jack boot powers are steaming up on all parents in close attendance, with surveillance and stealth, and those powersthatbe will spring on your door anytime now to denounce you as a parent, accuse you of abuse, and pack your newborn off to a state nursery to safeguard that child from your non-state aligned notions of welfare.

Now I might be exaggerating the tone of these home ed discussions. OK, I'm not. The mood out there is grim, and I may have to limit my exposure to safeguard my own sanity.

So this blog will concentrate on nothing more than how we are flushing ourselves down the toilet and laughing daily.

Shark, Squirrel and Tiger have learned to swear. They know all the bad words. Blame the mother. Hourly, I am listening to DamnOhmyGodBloodyPissOff.

If only they would not deliver this line with a hand already clapped across the mouth and the sparkling upturned eyes of DamnOhmyGodBloodyPissOff we are doing something REALLY NAUGHTY now teeheehee then I could stop bursting into laughter long enough to be outraged.

And I promise I will have that serious conversation about how you must not say this in the post office, but at home in the kitchen to Melvyn Bragg on Radio 4 is OK.

And it will also come in handy when the jackbooted powersthatbe come smashing down the door.


The Gossamer Woman said...

It's great to be home again, isn't it? Back to the reality of the grinding day to day business of the mighty government and state rules and big brother interference. What joyful countries we live in. Such true democracies. There's a large piece of paper with a hundred rules for every movement you make. Do not ever try to think independently or act upon it.

sharon said...

I suppose you are feeling quite wistful about Singapore now, at least there the city is clean, the trains run on time and there are no hooligans roaming the streets. Somjetimes I am sure that I'm turning into a rabid right-wing reactionary as I grow older whilst still trying desperately to hang onto my basic humanitarian principles. How about you?

Casdok said...

Ive thought worse waiting in the Post office!!

Pig in the Kitchen said...

oh you are back, i thought you'd set sail forever and i could silently follow your progress, whilst cursing you under my breath for having such a cool time.

I won't comment on the home ed issue, i don't have any experience, and - phew - don't live in england, i do so hate the stressed education system there.

but i will comment on swearwords. my kids proudly told me they knew all the swear words a few weeks ago. i'd had a couple of glasses of red, so i let them tell me as long as they sounded them out phonetically so the three year old wouldn't say 'wanker' at pre-school. they started off predictably with 'b-l-o-o-d-y', but i did blanch a little when the 6 year old spelt 'f-u-c-k' and when i thought it was all over, there was a pause and eldest said, 'i know another one...' and out came 'c - u -...' i wouldn't let her get to the end, and then i had to finish the bottle of red.

now where did she learn that??!!!


Grit said...

pig, that is truly a terrifying tale. the odd BLOODY is virtue by comparison!