What was I saying?

Grit is going through a strange phase. Perhaps it is the menopause. Perhaps my brain is leaking. Perhaps I am unbalancing while walking on eggshells round Tiger. Or perhaps I am preoccupied, counting the minutes until Elizabeth Hurley gets back on a plane on October 11th. But I am definitely Off.

I am getting very forgetful. Very forgetful indeed. For a start, I have, in the last week, or thereabouts, lost two pairs of glasses. I keep dreaming that I have left the first pair in a book, or amongst some papers. But they're not turning up. Not anywhere.

The second pair of glasses I lost last week were prescription sunglasses. I had to wear these at 11 o'clock at night to go food shopping at Tesco because I couldn't find the first pair. I have no recollection of these. One minute they were there. Then, Pfff! Gone. After fifteen minutes of searching Tesco, the only answer is to drive home squinting like Mr Magoo, hoping the police don't stop me because I am driving along the pavement again.

Glasses are not the only thing I am forgetting. Going to the bank to pay in a cheque and then realising I have not brought the cheque is routine. As is going to post a letter without the letter. Walking into rooms wondering what I've come in for. And taking back the books to the library that we bought from them last week in the sale. But this is the first time I've come home without the shopping.

How can I spend £58 on food at Tesco, then come home and put away two bags of shopping before wondering, Where is the coffee? And where are the cereals? Where is the syrup? I'm sure I bought that for Shark's recipe. And didn't I buy some bananas? Well none of the missing bags have fallen down the back of the car seats. And they're not in the boot. Not in the lobby. Nor under the car. No. That's because I've left them all at Tesco.

And if that's not bad enough, then I go and forget Squirrel. I leave her down at her ballet lesson and wonder where she is.

Next time I visit the library I'm looking out for a book on how to improve your short-term memory. That's if I remember, of course.